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Truly in Love or Addicted to Love?

Author: Felicity Maris Modesto

When two people are sincerely in love with each other, their relationship would exhibit mature qualities that deepen their relationship as a couple, at the same time allow each to grow as an individual. Being intimate, they are comfortable and open with one another. However, if either one is a love addict, the underlying motive behind the affection is tainted by deeply rooted emotional needs, which could cloud the relationship and lead to dramatic and even tragic consequences later on.

When You Are Truly in Love

If you seriously believe that you are in love, then you must be comfortable in baring your true self before your special someone. Delighting in the joy of the special feelings you share with him, you are uninhibited. You allow yourself to freely demonstrate your feelings in adequate ways that are driven solely by your affections, and not by an underlying motive or fear—it can either be borne of your desperate need to avoid being alone or a deeply rooted insecurity that prevents you from being comfortable with your true self in his presence.

You and your partner should be much aware of the value of each other as lovers and as individuals in your own right. Neither one outshines the other for each is secure of himself as a person worthy of esteem and love, in as much the same way that he maintains an awareness of how his partner is equally deserving of these as well. Thus, your identities remain intact. You move on together in harmony without compromising your personal space and needs. Although you are aware of the special bond that links you to each other, you also know that there is a bigger world aside from the one that only the two of you share together. As your relationship deepens and grows, each of you develops further; becoming stronger, wiser, and better persons.

 

Over time, as your relationship thrives, you would be able to weather storms, which would further deepen your attachment. However, given that the relationship ends due to one reason or another, each of you can still move on albeit going separate ways. Despite the pain of losing each other, you would gain strength and maturity via the wisdom obtained through your experience as romantic partners.

But if You Are Addicted to Love

Being a love addict, on the other hand, your personal experiences stemming all the way from your childhood has left you emotionally needy. Being in love for you may be a subconscious means of filling in the emotional void, which are open wounds that have yet to be realized and healed. Normally, as shown by many diagnosed cases, love addicts were starved of affection or attention as children. They were treated cruelly or coldly. Either way leaves them with deep emotional scars that eventually resurfaces and haunts them in their relationships many years later.

Hence, as a love addict, your interaction and actions in your relationship could be controlled by an underlying personal emotional need or fear. This could either drive you to compromise your identity just so that you keep your partner, thinking that you are doing it out of love for him. Or you may become helpless and totally dependent on him, to the point that you could not exist without him.

The culmination of the life drama involving love addicts are usually tragic and very painful. The consequences open them to other mental disorders like depression and anxiety, both of which could easily set in given certain instances. If you exhibit qualities similar to that of a confirmed love addict, do not think twice about seeking help right away. With proper treatment and therapy, you would eventually overcome your tendencies and put an end to the drama once and for all. Only when you have properly addressed your dilemma, could you claim the true happiness that comes from loving someone in the truest sense of the word.

About the Author:  Felicity Maris Modesto is a content writer/editor and visual artist with a passion for topics delving on health and self-improvement. She is interested in the emerging online pharmacy industry.

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